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My captain often surprises me.  So often, in fact, that you would think I would catch on and cease to be, er, surprised.  But no, I’m blissfully ignorant like that.  It makes life so much simpler that way.

Critter and Varmint and a couple of their friends were getting together for a ‘pick up’ basketball game at the local Catholic Church, St. Mary’s.  We often go there to play because it’s 1.) Free, 2.) close to most of our friend’s houses, 3.) always available, and 4) so squeaky clean and wholesome I feel like I’m back in the 1950s.   The basket never has a net on it, but that never stopped us.  We have good imaginations and sometimes can even imitate a “whoosh” sound if we feel the need.

We love going there.  I’ll sit and watch and they actively play.  I figure I’m getting exercise by proxy.

St. Mary’s basketball hoop is at the end of their parking lot, adjacent to their playground.  It’s got a beautiful view of Sugarloaf Mountain behind it.  You couldn’t ask for a better place for the kid’s to grow up.

So the kids and I were on our way to the church to play. My Captain did not come with us, as he sometimes does, because he said he had something to do.  He’s a busy busy busy (as in, really busy) man.  I understood.

We stopped to pick up friends and were pulling into the church parking lot to find, horror of horrors, someone was parked right underneath our basket!!  No one is ever parked there!  ARGH!!  But as we got closer, we saw it was, in fact, OUR van.  Our other car.  And then we noticed a ladder under the basket with none other than My Captain attaching a net he’d privately purchased for the kids and the church.

Mind you:  He is not Catholic, this isn’t our church, he rarely plays basketball himself, and most of the kids who play there are not ours.

But, as always, he saw a need and he filled it.  And, as usual, he did it quietly, without fanfare or bragging.  In fact, had we not caught him in the act, we would not have known he did it.  We would have thought the church had.

That’s My Captain.

Me, being me, called the Church Secretary and told her I expected us to get into the upcoming St. Patrick’s day church dinner at a substantial discount.

She told me I can have all the cabbage I want.

SWEET!

They say opposites attract. Does that mean that since he’s so kind, generous, and altruistic, that I am mean, miserly, and selfish?

Nuts.

I told you about my favorite cookie jar from Montana in  ~ Cute Cookies ~.  Love that thing.  That same trip and same gift shop in Apgar Village on the southernmost tip of Lake McDonald, was where I found my Drunken Duck.  I love him too, but not as much as I love my cookie jar.  Most probably because the duck doesn’t hold the promise of chocolate chip cookies.

I’m simple that way.

He holds bottled beverages of your choice.  Wine. Beer. Ketchup.  Whatever you might like him to hold for you.  He’s a very helpful sort of duck.  But there is one little quirk about him.

He drinks whatever you ask him to hold.

I remember having several friends like that in college.  Or now.  (Why am I thinking of both of my friends Cupcake and Dutch?)  Talk about Fowl play.  I mean if you can’t trust a friend with your drink, who can you trust?

(Answer: “Depends on the drink.”)

We don’t put the Drunken Duck to work very often because the poor critter suffered a broken webbed toe whilst holding a bottle of cheap wine.

But he still has enough cute-ness to rate hanging around.

I mean, come on.  You can’t ignore his silliness.

And you should know from my earlier post about Duck Butts how enamored I am with Duck Tuckuses.  (Tuckuses?  Go with it, she’s on a roll.)

Oh, and if you are wondering about the bottle in his beak currently….

Of course, a Dogfish Brew.

Got a little bit of Black Chai Tea and other weird flavors to it.  All I know is it makes My Captain happy.

And that, really is what I want more than almost anything.

A close second, of course, being Dogfish Head Restaurant’s Cajun Egg Rolls.

Which need to be bronzed, in my estimation.

What was I talking about?

Right.  The duck.

You are probably thinking about now that I have a fetish for Ducks.  And Moose.  I would tweak that and say that what I really like to do is surround myself with things that cause smiles.  Things that bring an involuntary happy wave to your mind.

I figure there are plenty of things in the world outside to cause the opposite.  I want my family to relax when they get home.  And feel content.

And chuckle at silly things.

And put life in perspective.

We bought a label maker.

Big deal?

I’ve labeled everything from the files in our filing drawer (which is the reason I bought it), to every cabinet in the kitchen, to the shelves in the closet.

I love this thing.  It’s so clean and it reeks of ORDER….something I always need more of.

I was having a blast labeling everything I could get my hands on.

Until I had to buy a new tape cartridge for my P-Touch Machine.

ONE measly cartridge cost $15.00!!!  ARGH!

Now I’m wishing I hadn’t wasted its tape labeling the catbox.

Or the Bidet.

Or the fishbowl.

From now on, only the essentials are getting labeled.

Like the mailbox.

and maybe the trash can.

and the cat food bin.

But that is absolutely it.

…except maybe the key rack.

…and the shoe rack.

But that is totally absolutely it.

….except maybe my sock drawer.

My mom used to buy me a special gift from the Orvis magazine every Christmas.  Slowly but surely she was building me a complete set.   It is fabulous.  No one I know has one.  And Orvis doesn’t make them anymore, so they have to be going gangbusters in value.  Not that I would ever ever ever sell them.  Man, now that I think about it, I probably ought to insure them.

Here they are:

They are the bottom halves of a duck family, just hanging out as they swim and feed…..on the ceiling.

I love the way people take a second look when they first spy it.

It never fails to make people laugh.  As it should.  As it is intended to.

I don’t know why Orvis stopped making them.  I would have bought more.

Maybe they could expand to other ceiling water feeders, like, …oh, I don’t know…..how about a moose head?  Wouldn’t that be cool?  His legs and feet could be dangling, and his head could be hanging down munching a piece of river grass.  How cool would that be?

I tell ya, I have a million ideas like these.  I don’t know why I’m not independently wealthy yet.

The guy with the “Sham Wow” not only made a heck of a fortune selling that stupid washcloth-on-steroids, but he is also famous.  He’s famous and rich, and here I am with all these ideas that are WAY better than that, and I can’t even afford to get my moustache lasered off.

There is no justice in this world.