Monthly Archives: April 2012

~ Chewable ~

I was sitting between two fantastically handsome men. Both tall.  Both dark.  Both handsome.  They both found me witty, charming, and smart.  I was delighted!

No, this wasn’t a dream, thank you.  It was real.

(All women reading this give me a “No Way!”  and I will reply, “WAY!”)

It happened a few days ago.  Sure, my husband was one of them.  Sure, the other one was his oldest and bestest friend.  Sure, we were in the middle of Medic Recert.  But none of those things change the fact that I was sitting between two hunks.

Life was good.

Until…..

Don’t you hate how there is always an ‘Until’ in my stories?  I sure as heck do.

Until….

My husband’s oldest and best friend leaned over and whispered in my ear,…..

“Have you got any Ibuprofen?”

I whispered back, “Sure!” and rummaged in my bag to pull out a bottle of chewable, (grape flavored, thank you very much) Motrin.  I always have some for the kids.

I handed him 6, and he chuckled, “I figured you would.  You can always count on Mommys to have stuff like that in their bags.  As big as yours is, I knew you would.”

POP.  SSSSSSssssssssssss.

I don’t need to be liked, or popular, or seen as anything remarkable.  But I WOULD like it if I weren’t thought of as a dependable pack mule.

Oh well.  If I cry about it, I’m sure I’ll find some tissues in my bag….

Categories: Uncategorized | 2 Comments

~ Hints From Heloise ~

I had a ‘Hints From Heloise’ moment today.  Do you remember her?  Back in my growing up years she was a columnist who had a ton of amazingly simple, sometimes weird, but practical ideas for making life easier.

She was the Queen of working smarter, not harder.

So I’m at Loews today, buying Ivy and Diet Mountain Dew….

(don’t judge)

….and after I rolled my purchases out to the minivan, I realized as I opened the hatch that I hadn’t removed last night’s crap out of the back.  I was looking at gas can funnels, empty pizza boxes, and softball cleats.  (Makes you wonder what we do for fun, doesn’t it?)

I looked at the Ivy, thought about putting it on the pizza box tops, and then it hit me….OPEN the pizza boxes, and put the dirt-bottomed ivy containers on them…thereby saving the car carpet from the dirt, stabilizing the pots better for transport, recycling the boxes, and utilizing the space more efficiently.  It was awesome.  I felt so organized and capable.

Yes, I can spin the world so even Trash affirms me.

I ran some more errands, drove home, and began to remove everything from the car.  It was hard to move the Ivy out because I was busy patting myself on the back for being so gosh darn shrewd.

I put the ivy containers (still in the pizza boxes) down in the beds where they are to be planted and took some things inside.  But when I opened the door, the cats, God love ’em, ran outside before I could stop them.  Usually corralling them back inside is a job and a half, but this time, they stopped at the ivy and were pushing at the pots with their noses.  They didn’t hear me coming, and I was able to scoop them both up and take them inside.

When I went back outside, I saw that my ivy was smudged with old pizza sauce and cheese bits.  Who knew that old pizza ingredients were a kitty-lure?

This made me even prouder.  My Pizza box trash was now not only an effective plant carrier, it also served as a cat-trap.

I’m totally going to patent this.

Don’t tell anyone.

Categories: Uncategorized | Leave a comment

~ Winner of the Moose Naming Contest ~

The tension has been killing everyone, I know…but I promise the wait was worth it.

Drumroll Please!!!

The name of the Moose is now “MAXWELL”.   Maxwell Moose.

Congratulations to “Glenda 123” for submitting it!  We will be contacting you via email to arrange delivery of my World Famous Turbo Rumballs!

Great job, everybody!  We enjoyed the ideas you had!

Maxwell thanks you, too!

Love,

Mama B

Categories: Uncategorized | Leave a comment

mamaboe's avatarMama Boe

Tonight, I stopped by My Captain’s firestation to bring him lunch for tomorrow (He’s working a 36 hour shift).  When I got there, he was not…he was on an EMS call.  As usual, it came as he was just sitting down to dinner.  I sat down to wait for him to come back, and had a nice conversation with Lt. Tom.  I love that guy.  He is SUCH a good cook that we swap recipes. (Firehouses are notorious for their awesome cooks.)

Tom and I were discussing the pros and cons of Pastry versus Potato Hash in Egg Pies when My Captain walked in.  His untouched dinner was still on the kitchen table and he was ABOUT to sit down to eat it when….

….the alarm bells went off again.  This time it was a fire.  And by fire, I mean FIRE.

So off he went, barely having time to brush his lips…

View original post 1,328 more words

Categories: Uncategorized | Leave a comment

~ A Few Good Medics ~

One of the seasoned medics in our Recert Class today gets so frustrated with some of the firefighters he works with, because they aren’t as interested in the EMS side of things as they are the Fire Suppression side of things.  He took a few lines from the movie “A Few Good Men” to drive home the point that they HAVE to understand the importance of EMS within their job.  I loved it.

I begged him to let me share it with you, but he said he would only do it on the condition of anonymity.

So, without further ado, for your enjoyment,  Ladies and Gentlemen, May I present to you (…you see, the joke here is that this is all further ado.  Oh, never mind.)

A Few Good Medics

Kaffee:  Colonel Jessep, is EMS the backbone of the fire service?

Judge:  You don’t have to answer that question!

Col. Jessep:  I’ll answer the question!  You want answers?

Kaffee:  I think I’m entitled.

Col. Jessup:  You want answers?

Kaffee:  I want the truth!

Col. Jessup:  You can’t handle the truth!  Son, we live in a world of sick people, and those people have to get to the hospital by men in ambulances.  Who’s going to do it? You?  You, Lt. Weinburg?

I have a greater responsibility than you can fathom.  You weep for the firefighters and curse EMS.  You have the luxury of not knowing what I know.  That you don’t fight many fires, though tragic, is a fact.  And our existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives.  You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at the firehouse, you want us on that ambulance, you need us on that ambulance.

We use words like Compassion. Caring. Empathy.  We use these words as the backbone of a service dedicated to the community.

You use them as a punchline.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very service that we provide, then treat us like the bastard children of the department.  I would rather you just said “Thank you,” and went on your way.

Otherwise, I suggest you pick up an aide bag and ride an ambulance.  Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Kaffee:  Is EMS the backbone of the fire service?

Col. Jessep:  We do the job.

Kaffee:  Is EMS the backbone of the fire service?

Col. Jessep:  You’re Goddamn right it is!

End Scene

Did that give you chills, or what?  It gave me chills.  Maybe it makes more sense to people actually involved in Fire and Rescue, but you get the idea.

EMS is like the red-headed stepchild of Fire and Rescue, and I don’t understand why.   It’s the most important part of what it’s all about.  Maybe it is because so many citizens abuse the system, and use 911 for non-emergent calls.  Maybe it’s because so many people thank their doctors and nurses, but forget about the EMTs and Medics who get them there.  Maybe it’s because mopping up blood and urine and vomit is never as glamorous as you might think it is (DO you think it is?).

You never see or smell the vomit on EMS related TV shows.   And believe me, there is a lot of Vomit in EMS.   Vomit doesn’t sell, apparently.  If it did, you would see more vomit on TV and in the movies.  But vomit doesn’t sell.

And that is all I have to say about Vomit.

Except that the smell is really unglamorous.

And nasty.

And dry-heave inducing.

Hey….now that I think about it, that might be one of the reasons EMS is the red-headed stepchild of the Fire and Rescue service.  They can’t handle the vomit!

Categories: Fire and Rescue | Tags: , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Blog at WordPress.com.